I leaned close and dropped my voice to a conspiratorial whisper.

“They’re not as good as the big juicy ones they slice up and put on double cheeseburgers. But you’ll get used to them.” 

Their shoulders sagged like the wilted lettuce on their plate.

I've never been much for New Year's resolutions. Not because I'm perfect. Far from it. I've started, stopped, reworked, and restarted countless self-improvement regimes. Sometimes inspired by an idea for a new project, a change in career direction, or a personal goal, and other times frightened into action by a doctor’s warning or upset by a pair of tight pants I swore fit fine the week before. 

As part of the process, I’ve read hundreds of self-improvement books, joined gyms, downloaded apps, attended seminars and lectures, and subscribed to countless newsletters. Some worked and some didn’t. Some of the lessons stuck, and others slipped away.

 I still pick up a self-improvement or inspirational book now and then, but fewer than I used to. Sooner or later, you reach a point in your life where the person you are is the person you are. I'm there. I still need to re-sand the rough edges, re-evaluate and re-energize from time to time, and I do still try to improve myself. But for the most part, in the immortal words of comedian Flip Wilson's drag persona Geraldine, "What you see is what you get.”

Enter Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Arnold needs little introduction. A Mr. Universe, Hollywood star, former Governor of California, and ex-husband of a Kennedy, he’s a global icon. Although his career and notoriety span much of my life, he’s never been a celebrity I paid much attention to. Though I have seen a few of his movies. The Running Man is a favorite. Arnold’s framed hero pitted against Family Feud legend Richard Dawson’s evil game show host, and of course, his classic sci-fi thriller, The Terminator. The original. Not the sequels.

I knew he’d written a new book, but I didn’t have any interest. Then I heard his interview with Marc Maron, on Marc’s WTF podcast. 

Arnold was funny and engaging and soon after I listened, I bought the book. Arnold writes about what he believes are the seven tools for life. Most self-improvement books follow a familiar pattern with an attempt to provide a unique twist. Arnold didn’t break new ground, but his life story is fascinating, his experiences in Hollywood and government insightful, and his anecdotes inspiring.

The last tool of the seven resonated the most with me. It grows out of the book’s title, Be Useful. As Arnold tells it:

“It doesn’t matter how young or old you are, how much or how little you have, how much you’ve done or how much you have left to do. In every case, giving more will get you more. Want to help yourself? Help others. Learn to start from that place, and that is how you will become the most useful version of yourself – to your family, to your friends, to your community, to your nation…and to the world." 

As I read those words, I could hear Arnold saying them in his familiar German accent. The voice that brought us one of the most famous and often quoted movie lines of all time from The Terminator.

“I’ll be back.”

When I thought about it, I realized he was right. I feel most successful when I feel useful. Teaching, helping someone reach a goal, volunteering with non-profits and community groups. Contributing to someone else’s success.

So, in the New Year, whether you’re a resolutionist or someone like me who makes a mid-course correction when the mood strikes, take this important step. Either to yourself or out loud - in your best Arnold Schwarzenegger impression - say the words that could change your life, the lives of others, and maybe even the world.

“I’ll give back.”

Thinking about the salad bar exchange, I realized I missed an opportunity to be useful. Instead of tormenting the new dieter, I could have helped ease their journey in search of better health and instead of the cheeseburger line said, "The little tomatoes are so much more delicious and nourishing for you.”

 But sometimes, I enjoy being a nuisance.

Hey. What you see is what you get.